Our news feeds are flooded daily with these gems...
Egyptians have a knack for turning everyday phrases into super ball-crushing statements that conjure up images of us choking kittens. Well maybe it’s not that bad but not a day passes by where we are not online going through our feed only to discover there’s another new statement added to the already existing list of horrific phrases. Here are some of the things we see daily online.
Keep It Up (usually followed by ya bro or the thumbs up)
Ya bro and the thumbs up are quite horrible as it is, but the 'keep it up' and more specifically its usage, is just so annoying and counter productive because it stops us from wanting to continue whatever it is we have to keep up. It reads like a sticker you got on your homework in grade school. So can we stop with the freaking keep it ups, ya bros.
The B and P
This is battle has ensued for ages; from primary school teachers, to let’s face it, 50% of our moms, Egyptians are struggling with the abbles and the ped. But what’s rather curious is how this has taken form in social media. It’s puzzling to see how it manifests when people type Arabic words like as7apy, or hapipi. COME ON.
Enjoy It To The Max
This is our favourite. NOT. As a nation of frivolous over doers there seems to be no other way to celebrate Ramadan, your birthday, your graduation or your recent trip to Mykonos or Berlin or wherever the hip kids go these days, without enjoying to the max. Whatever that means or whatever that entails please keep us out of it. There’s nothing worse than the imagery that comes to mind when kids get together and enjoy to the max, assuming it entails what we think it does.
Because the L and the O and the L are sometimes maybe too far apart? Or maybe because Lucifer isn’t our lord. For one reason or another, we have come up with the phonetic version to depict a laugh and are using it now as our own version of 'lol'.
…..... Was here
This one is weird really - like the others weren’t. We’re starting to document our existence on other people’s pictures. Well I guess that makes sense when people aren't really going places or defacing monuments at historical sites; other people's profile pictures are as good as it gets.
Used by the religious and the needy, this share or your soul won't ascend to heaven stuff is really annoying, but you know what's even more annoying, is when you actually go ahead and do it.
How about I just EKHBAT your face, with a hammer, repeatedly.