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Cairo Christmas Shenanigans

Remember when you were a kid and your parents told you that Santa only brings presents to good little girls and boys who behave nicely? They lied.

Santa likes it naughty. So if you want to get some [gifts] this Christmas, you’d better make it to one these frisky fetes.

Kicking off the holiday naughtiness, Cairo Jazz Club is hosting Mistletoe & Mayhem. The Christmas Eve party promises to be anything but a Silent Night with DJs Misty & Hafez spinning some of the loudest, dirtiest tech and deep house mixes in Cairo. This is the last chance before Santa’s sleigh departs to prove that you’re worthy of his fat ass cramming down your chimney.

Because they’d rather die than let a day go by without a good party, Cairo Jazz Club is keeping the party going on Christmas night. A Time for Giving, featuring The Beatles cover band Glass Onion, showcases the sophisticated side of Christmas. The kind-hearted folks at Jazz Club are donating all profits to charity. They think we’re wrong about the naughty Santa thing. We’re not. But it IS a great cause, benefiting the Canossa Vocational Centre. And Santa definitely doesn’t give gifts to those who don’t like The Beatles or their cover bands, so be there.

We imagine Santa’s elves got all hot and bothered when they heard about Amici Heliopolis’Christmas Fever. The cocktail gurus have planned an evening of internationally themed food and holiday drinks. Sounds, innocent enough, right? Well it’s open bar, which obviously spells trouble. And if unlimited cocktails aren’t enough to make you misbehave, DJ Amir Megali’s set will find you getting dirty on the dance floor.
Never missing out on the chance to get a little risqué, Amici Zamalek is joining in on the Christmas fun as well. On the 25th, head to Cairo’s favourite cocktail bar for Christmas X Awadi Brothers. We just know the progressive house DJs are going to set the mood for naughtiness, and even if they don’t, the open bar certainly will.
Kinky old Kris Kringle would surely be proud of Tamarai’s Christmas party, Noel Encore. Hip-hop favourites Consoul Trainin and DJ Feedo will find everyone getting mischievous under the mistletoe, and we’re expecting a downright dirty dance performance by Sugarbabes. We hear Santa’s going to be extra nice to this set!
Cavallini is joining in the Christmas spirit with Beauty & Glamour Christmas Night, featuring Lebanese sensation Maya Diab. The sultry seductress’s head-to-toe tattoo puts her permanently on the naughty list, and her singing is sure to put any Christmas carolers to shame. This is one holiday concert you don’t want to miss.
Last on our list of holiday hooligans, but certainly not least, is The Maison Blanche Christmas Party on the 20th. The super-exclusive night will bestow a night of complete debauchery on a lucky few, with the house sounds of DJs Fahmy & Samba, and hip-hop sets by DJs Moneim and Hook. Good luck getting in, but if you do, you’re definitely on Santa’s good side.
As always, you can book your spot at all of Cairo’s hottest venues on! Merry Christmas!
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