Previous Post
Middle East Now in Florence
Next Post
Il Mulino: Wake & Bake!

Gods of Egypt - No Egyptians

An epic production depicting the gods of Ancient Egypt has been announced with an all-white cast, not a single Ahmed among them...

There was a brief moment of joy when we found out that there's a new blockbuster set to hit cinemas soon, that's all about our amazing, ancient, famous, legendary, awesome country and civilisation. That brief moment rapidly evaporated into thin air when we discovered that this film, entitled, Gods of Egypt, will feature no actual Egyptians, and to rub salt in this national wound, they won't even be shooting the damn thing in Egypt. Shooting started for the movie this week in Australia. AUSTRALIA! Like, you couldn’t possibly get any further from Egypt if you tried; geographically, demographically, culturally, anything. And it seems like they were really trying. Really feels like a conscious effort to put as much distance between Egypt and the movie as humanly possible. We are displeased.

The epic $150 million blockbuster is directed by Australian (TANY?) director Alex Proyas and will focus on the face-off between the evil god Set, played by Gerard Butler, and Horus, played by Nikolaj Coster-Waldeu (aka Jamie Lannister from Game of Thrones aka Kingslayer aka he of the chopped off hand). So essentially, Hollywood is making a film about Egypt, set in Egypt, but not actually set in Egypt and with a totally white cast. We mean, they're not even tanned enough to pass for Egyptians. Jamie Lannister's a damn blonde for god's sake!

Why doesn’t Hollywood like us? We brown people are a lovely race. We're perpetually tanned and we're awfully friendly. We'd have given you enough koshary to feed every extra in the cast and send some back home. Quite frankly, we're a little insulted you didn’t even have the decency to shoot the film in our country. At the very least we could have stalked Gerard Butler.

However – there is a sliver of hope! – the Gods of Egypt crew did request extras of "Middle-Eastern appearance." La2 kattar kheirko. We checked the entire cast list on IMDB. There's not a single Ahmed on there.